It’s important for kids to see how their choices result in certain consequences. For example, my daughter was falling apart at lunch today. I explained to her that it’s so much harder for her to have self control because she chose to wake up too early. There are no excuses. We don’t say, “Oh, you’re just tired.” We say, “Since you didn’t get as much sleep, you have to work so much harder to have self control. If you choose to go to bed like we asked (she was up not sleeping until past 11:00) and if you laid in bed to see if you could fall back asleep in the morning like I’ve suggested (she woke up before 7:00), then it would be so much easier for you to be under control. You’re making it hard on yourself because of your decisions.” There are still consequences to her behavior too. You can tie their behaviors to the type of foods they might choose to eat. You can tie natural consequence (I love those) to their decisions. ”You wouldn’t have gotten hurt if you were riding your bike the way you had been taught.” ”You wouldn’t have fallen if you had obeyed me and tied your shoes when I asked.” They need to see that we have their best interest in mind. If you can show how we’re on their side and there are reasons for the rules, than the rules become easier to follow. It makes it easier for them to follow God’s rules too if you make the connection. ”God loves you and cares about you. He sets his ‘rules’ in place to protect you and keep you from harm.” You can also point out the good that comes from listening. ”You chose to change your attitude, and look at how much fun you had. What a great choice.” ”You chose to share with your friend, and now I see her sharing with you. What a leader you are. Doesn’t that feel good?” Our parenting should be leading them to truths about God, and I really see that in the connection you can make between their actions and the good or bad that comes out of their choices.
